Journey to a 'happily ever after'.

By Nathalie Naval

It’s every (almost) young girl’s dream—to meet your prince charming, to wear your white long dress, and to walk down the flower-infested aisle. I don’t speak for every girl out there, but I believe majority of us, in some miniscule part of our childhood, thought of this scene as our ideal love story. Who wouldn’t, right? After all, we’re surrounded by countless fairy tales with all the princes, princesses and their ‘happily ever afters’. Well at the very least, that was the case for me, who was born in the ‘80s.

I’m 23 now, recently married, working as a professional web designer, and currently living with my husband in our own condo in Manila. I’m now living in my own ‘happily ever after’. 

But you see, it was a long and harsh road before I reached this happy place. Before I uttered the words “I Do”, there was a time that I stopped believing in love & relationships. I was one of many who eventually cursed fairy tales—simply because relationships when you’re 15 rarely turn to something. More often than not, it is the time you’re supposed to make mistakes, the time you learn lessons the hard way, the time you get your heart broken, the time you get betrayed and feel you’re at the bottom of the world, the time when your life seems like it is ending. Fairy tales doesn’t really include a handbook for surviving heartbreaks and betrayals. 
 … 
 … 
 … 
Then I blew the candles on my birthday cake for the nth time. 

 I eventually learn to accept things and deal with them. Sure, it doesn’t happen overnight, and it also doesn’t mean that it happens to everybody, but I guess it did for me. Some may call this being jaded, in some way, maybe it is, but I’ve learned that it is much easier to enjoy life by accepting and dealing with all the things that are happening to me– I’ll have sooooo much spare time to think and do something else. 

I lived my teenage life in reverse. It's ironic that I spent my high school days crying and weeping over boys and all the harsh things they do, and all the things that I can’t control, to then realize that I spent my college days playing RPGs, watching animes, going out with friends for coffee and just enjoying life. 

Enjoying my life gave me the perspective, the attitude, and the experience I needed to meet my prince charming. All the lessons I’ve learned from my past relationships are still there, guiding me through, acting as a shield so I won’t be hurt again. But then, my new-found hobbies are what enabled me to spend more time with my boyfriend just having fun. 

Fast forward to 10 months ago, I announced my engagement to my friends and family. Most of my family and relatives were surprised mainly because they think I’m too young to get married. On the other hand, most of our friends thought he knocked me up. 

We got married not on a whim, not because I'm pregnant, not because I could finally celebrate my own wedding, but because we want to be husband and wife. It’s not about age, but of perspective. It may sound cliché, but the saying is true that you will feel it in your gut when you’re ready to get married. 

Some say that getting married is a grown up decision. Surely it is, but do I feel any different when we were in college as boyfriend and girlfriend? Nope. Not at all. Sure I wake up beside him everyday, and sure, I cook, wash the dishes and do the laundry now, but at the same time, we still play RPGs, read our manga, watch animes, and do childish things. 

During my wedding day, I realized that fairy tales aren’t real, but love stories are. It might take awhile, but if I really continued on without believing, without learning anything, I won’t be in a happy place now. You got to love the perks of being 20+ huh? As for family? 

Let’s re-visit that after 5 or more years, shall we?




(Read Nathalie's blog here: http://amoensia.tumblr.com)